Saturday, June 04, 2005

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The CHAP SAR TIAM SECRET SOCIETY, a Geylang-based organization for youth, is now recruiting members to fulfill a tender they are submitting to the new casi… sorry, sorry, integrated resort.
Please fill in the form below and mail to : Mr. Chao Ah Beng
Membership Occifer Chap Sar Tiam Secret Society 69 Geylang Lorong 69 Singapore 696969
Reference code: TalkingCock.com

APPLICATION FOR MEMBERSHIP IN CHAP SAR TIAM SECRET SOCIETY
1. NRIC No.: _________________
2. Surname: __________________
3. First name: (please X)
[ ] Johnson
[ ] Benson
[ ] Samson
[ ] Hamson
[ ] Janson
[ ] Other: _________________ (if not ending in ‘son’, please explain why)
4. Chinese Name: Ah __________(if not beginning with ‘Ah’, please explain why)
5. Age:
[ ] Under 35
[ ] Lau Beng
6. Sex:
[ ] M
[ ] F
[ ] at Geylang
7. Length of Last Fingernail: ________ (cm)
8. Ability to squat for:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] more than 2 hours (wah, steady!)
9. Hairstyle:
[ ] Spiky
[ ] Dyed with streaks of blond
[ ] Dyed with streaks of red
[ ] Two strands dangling in front of eyes
[ ] Kana mop like that
[ ] Perm (please state which saloon in JB you went)____________________
10. Tattoo of:
[ ] Tiger
[ ] Dragon
[ ] Snake
[ ] Eagle
[ ] Hello Kitty
11. Work experience: (please X all that apply)
[ ] KTV Launge Bouncer
[ ] Snooker Hall Attendant
[ ] Unlicensed Contractor
[ ] Freelance debt collector
[ ] Unlicensed bookie
[ ] Dispute Resolution and Settlement Professional
[ ] Unemployed
12. Spouse's Name: _________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: _________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: (the one in Batam, that one) _________________________
Lover's Name: _________________________
2nd Lover's Name: (Lorong 69, that pooi-pooi one) _________________________
13. Number of children living in household: ____
Number of children living in foster care: ____
Number of children that are actually yours: ____
14. Mother's Name: _________________________ (If not sure, leave blank)
15. Father's Name: _________________________ (If not sure, leave blank)
16. Education: (Circle how many years it took you to finish primary school)
8 9 10 11 12
17. Ability to swear: (please X all that apply)
[ ] Hokkien
[ ] English
[ ] Malay
[ ] Tamil
[ ] Cantonese
[ ] rude hand gestures
18. Service performed in previous secret society:
[ ] Leadership/Tua Tao
[ ] Junior management/Suay Tao
[ ] Physical activities/Hooting
[ ] Dispute Resolution and settlement/Cham Siong
[ ] Lookout/Kuah Chui
With your application, please also enclose sample of blood (need not be your own)
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Saturday, April 16, 2005

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Freakkkkkkking Crappy week...
loads of last min shat, had to do the freaking LRI *Logistic Readiness Inspection*
and ITS not my freaking job. The PS shld be the one doing it..damn
well that's not the worse thing. Yesterday friday i was suppose to have a 1/2 day off. Last min i was arrowed for guard duty. Hur Hur.....damn pissed.....oh well i hope can get something to ease my painnnnnnnnnnnnnn
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Saturday, April 09, 2005

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EXERCISE CLUB 040405 - 070405
Yay outfield..can't wait to chiong into jungle. Yeah rite
But the exercise was alrite. Come to think of it, i had a bit of fun. Everyone was practically slacking , coz no one was in the mood for tis crap. After our deployment drill, i even ran over to platoon 4's harbouring area to find hong ge, yilun and the rest to have maggi nooddle. haha...maggi tastes great when u are at outfield, somehow for no reason its flavour seems to magnify tenfold.

At nite, ATC was hilarious. For our OC was like a soccer commentator, giving out instructions via radio and acknowledging them himself.
Here's an example when he contacts a fictional artillary unit to request fire
OC: 46 to 321 Alpha Bravo 3, message over
and he will reply to himself
OC: This is 321 Alpha Bravo 3, send message over
Our platoon was sniggering over all the radio transmissons...hahaha

Much later in the nite, our platoon was ambushed. Our PC Lt Francis had to choose cards to determine the amount of soldiers left surviving. He was lucky and got a blank one which was zero casualties. But of coz they won't let like a platoon survive and demand that one section to be down.

In the end it was okay...our platoon 5 reached the rest area 1st...yeahh misson complete
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Sunday, March 27, 2005

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So sorrie!! due to lack of time i'm squeezing all of March happenings into one:
Well..basically tis month is standby duties and more standby crap.
Rushing down the stairs to the sound of the wailing siren. In Full Battle Order...Bleah...
Aniwae i got to know some cocksters in Bravo like WeeHong n Lip.
Learned a ton of their lingo like: - siiiiiiiiiibei niao!
- maxxxxxxxxx
- johnus
- and the ultimate Supercalifragislisticexpiadlidociousjohnu
shoulanpishabilityfiedlebility
wahhahahaahahaha.....man, its good to have them for company in tis bleak place. Really brightens up my day. Especially with @ss-poking using various objects...haha
Oh yeah, i've recieved my 1st or rather 4 extras in tis unit.
3 for sleeping in bunk *caught by battlation 2ic*
1 for a screwed up standby
wheee......our entire platoon specs *tar bao* duties for a month
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Sunday, February 20, 2005

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this week...so far: 14 - 20th of feb
damn sian in camp
we had coy cohesion day..played stupid games which made us ran around the whole camp
haiz.....but at least my platoon won the games.....especially the last game which involves water bombs.....haha....
guess wat i'm was arrowed...yes yet again, to be mc again for unit cohesion day.
which is some kinda post chinese new year dinner...
i felt damn fed up...y i'm the one who always gets this kind of sh|t?? overmore it was last min..
damn...i know tis attitude is bad but i' just freaking sianz...no mood to eat the freaking yu sheng
hope the ppl who arrowed me lao sai...hehe
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Saturday, February 12, 2005

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Gambling at Kaiwen's hm *aka God Of Gamblers!*


hoho..gamble must have style!

ohhhh...yes, as per tradition on chinese new year. After gambling at james place, kaiwen's home will be next. haha...into another gambling den.
As usual we will play cards 1st...blackjack...
but no one wants to be the banker! so we decide everyone has to take a turn to be one.
*sweats* no joke leh...if everyone's cards are bigger then yours, u will lose big time
eventually i moved on to majong..which is even worse
the bets were much more higher then my usual games last time...not to mention
.....i was damn rusty
but luck was on my side! or rather Chow Yun Fatt...hehe...at 1st was losing
but last minute i managed to win quite abit with the last hand. i made qing yi se with zi mo!
hehe...haiz...quite a day...ended it with coffee late at nite in holland
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great...
Booked in last nite. And guess wat?
tis morning when i woke up and looked out of my bunk's window.
The camp was like totally deserted...there was no one in the battalion!
crap..wonder y the hell we have to be back??
haiz...i'm getting to get sick of the coy management...
i also those who were in camp today has an off on monday...wat the #$$#
guess yours truely din have a off record, so for ppl with no off record = to zero off
man...i'm suppose to know every single policy or how the company runs when my foot touches
the coy's soil....woah....
anyway we booked out at 4pm. After much anticipation from the thinking tat we are booking out after lunch. heh...shiok sia...i love mental torture
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Thursday, February 10, 2005

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CYN Chu 2
i went to carol's aunt home today..haiz..the sian feeling is here coz i have to
book in camp tonite. i wished i could spend more time with her........
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CYN Chu Yi
yay..1st day of the lunar new year but haiz..so quiet over at my grandma's home
only one of my cousin and her family was there. I really missed the times when i was younger and the whole entire family will have reunion dinner together and on Chu Yi we will meet again to wish each other happy new year and get ang baos...i just wonder wat happened to us all these years...

Anyway after having lunch with Carol n my family at granny's place. I send my folks back home b4 fetching Derek and heading down to James home. Well i can say tat it's different too from last time..i actually felt bored there..nothing much to do except gamble..
But later was more interesting. Me, Carol, Derek, Kawien, David, Linda, Jun Yin and Felicia head down to Arab street to try shisha.

Shisha is tobacco mixed with molasses and fruit flavors and is smoked in a hookah. A hookah consists of a hollow glass (sometimes clay or brass) base which is filled with water, a vertical pipe topped with a clay bowl for shisha and coals, and a usually colorful hose.

The smell is very fruity...coz they ordered apple n strawberry flavours..man it reminded me of my smoking days last time in NP. Except shisha smells better, but its still quite strong. i was choking on my 1st puff. hehe..interesting..haiz..another day tml...

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Tuesday, February 08, 2005

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Lunar New Year Eve
oh yeah..chinese new year is here again..had reunion dinner at hm
hmmm...if u called it a 'reunion dinner' coz its just my family: Dad,Mom,Bro n me
come to think of it the whole family relationship on my dad's side is quite estranged
had outcamp run tis morning b4 i came home..quite irritating coz i was arrowed to be the
MC..i rather run man..and the conducting officer keep coming up to me for last min changes
argh..itz damn screwed up i tell u..
gd thing is the whole event ended early at around 10am..
but our coy had to booked in last nite where other companies can stay out
and we had to be up at freaking 4am...damn
After dinner i just slacked n was feeling tired..no mood to go out even though
Carol wanted me to go out with her family to chinatown and David asked me to see the fireworks...JUST PLAIN TIRED...
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Sunday, February 06, 2005

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When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
You're so very special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.

I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so very special
I wish I was special
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Sunday, January 30, 2005

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APB week:
Tis week was burning hell....build the Acrow Panel Bridge at Nee Soon camp
the temp was so hot tat my lips cracked, face became black....
haiz...but saw my old course mates in camp...so not tat bad...
but frm tis exercise i can see the true colours of Bravo coy...can say tat..no matter
how hard you work...the effort is wasted
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A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. "Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your passions that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff."If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your wife/husband/kids out to dinner. Maybe even play another 18. There's always time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."
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Friday, January 28, 2005

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For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
For beautiful eyes, look for the good in other people.
To lose weight, let go of stress, hatred, anger, contentment and the need to control others.
To improve your ears, listen to the word of God. Rather than focus on the thorns of life, smell the roses and count your blessings, giving thanks for each one of them.
For poise, walk with knowledge and self-esteem.
To strengthen your arms, hug at least 3 people a day.
Touch someone with your love.
To strengthen your heart, forgive yourself and others.
Don't worry and hurry so much.Rather than walk this earth lightly, walk firmly with determination and leave your mark.
For the ultimate in business, casual or evening attire put on the robe of Christ; it fits like a glove but allows room for growth. Best of all, it never goes out of style and is appropriate for any occasion.
Doing these things on a daily basis will certainly make you a more beautiful person.
Peace Is Not The Absence Of Trouble But The Presence of God

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Sunday, January 23, 2005

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this week's events: 17/01/2005 - 23/01/2005
moved into bravo coy this week...not very gd i'll say...my off on monday was cut short when yilun my friend called me and said i better book in early. Why? coz bravo never arranged anything for us..i had to find a bunk..check if there's an empty bed..find a mattress, cupboard..in short i had to do everything myself so tat i'll have a place to sleep tat nite...further more
the 5 of us have 2 be the Duty Spec for 2 weeks...take the WHOLE coy for meals..draw their arms plus other stuff...AND we have to do guard/COS duties too...sianz rite??
i think i'm going to need a long time to adapt to bravo coy...haiz...Army is damn jian/sly
Gd thing tat tis week has a public holiday...or else i will go insane in camp
helped carrot to paint her house on friday..took the whole dayyyy..phew..tot it will never finish
her hm looks more brighter n bigger now =)
yeah..n bought the nike dunk high shoes *brown in colour* frm far east! hehehe..wicked man..

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Sunday, January 16, 2005

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Update of e past one week...
12/01/2005 - 16/01/2005: tis is the last week of CEC...meaning i have to leave delta soon...haiz...had a summery exercise on wed...i had to take my section to construction all the obstacles and mine cluster..mainly everything they have learn...it lasted nearly 24 hrs...started 8am wed and ended 7am plus thurs...everyone was stoned n concussed to the MAX...*including myself* haha...took the day off on thurs...need the time off, i will go insane if i continue to stay in camp...had IMT on fri...*the arcarde thingy* in Nee Soon...nothing after tat and i booked out for nitez off...Sat was range...Combat shoot...seem confusing at 1st...but i got the hang of it and of coz...hehe...i'm a marksman...=P



BUT i booked out at 11pm plus...as usual everything dragged...rushed to wait,wait to rushed...Sunday i went to ikea with carol..helped to get new curtain for her home..had a fun day with her...hmmm
i think my home needs new curtains too...n i need a new study table...current one is SAGGING
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Tuesday, January 11, 2005

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YEAH...my blog is finally DONE!! whoo hoooo! yeah..it took me over a month and some stuff ard my blog is not completed but hey looks not bad rite??...haha...*fingers crossed*
friends of mine...pls comment!!
well well....BMT is over.....CEC *common engineer course* almost over tis week argh...going over to Bravo...YES...Bravo coy not Charlie... damn...i feel like a freaking soccer ball...being kicked around the battalion..haiz there goes the 8am - 5pm course...=P
but ONE good thing is...i maybe get to slack earlier...haha...coz Bravo gonna stand down middle of tis year...and overmore...maybe got missons for us...wat izzit abt...tell ya all more...IF it is confirmed..haiz..got range tis sat..cya tis weekend yah??
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